For the uninitiated, he’s a friend’s father. He’s lived a very interesting, full life and has seen ups and downs and more. While I met him just a couple of times, that too, in passing, I consider him like a guru who’s taught me from afar. He’s the Drona to the Eklavya in me. I’ve heard numerous stories from my friend, her husband, and her relatives. There are hardly any interactions with the friend when a Nath Saab story doesn’t pop up.
The other day I met her for something and I was talking about my challenges with managing working capital at C4E. She mentioned Nath Saab and of course a story from him.
I will spare the details but in broad strokes, the story goes as follows…
Nath Saab once fell on hard times. He had to take some business loans – from individuals and institutions, and he was unable to pay them back in time. When he knew he wouldn’t be able to pay, he went to the creditors and told them, “Main khada hoon, kahin nahi ja raha. Aaj nahi hai. Jis din honge, wapas doonga.”
And he did.
Found himself a job, earned, saved and paid every penny back, bit by bit.
This translates into, I am not running away. I dont have the money right now and the day I get it, I will pay you back.
Now, this seems like an inconsequential statement. But to me, this amplified Nath Saab’s reputation even more. He went many notches higher. And gave me one of the greatest life lessons ever.
That we are nothing but our reputation.
And different people have different ways to build, grow and sustain reputations.
For Nath Saab, it was his zubaan. Similar to what Rajesh Sir taught me. Something that I am developing as I get older.
To me, this means I want to respect other people’s time and do what I say I will do. I will also bring my passionate, energetic, best self to every conversation I am invited to. I will add yathashakti value to every interaction I am a part of. I will want to ensure that I do my best when no one is watching. I bring my A-game to circuit boards, wooden fences and everything else.
Another snippet from him is from his interview with Playboy magazine in 1985 (I don’t know how many of you were even conceptualised at that time) where he’s talking about carpentry.
So that!
I will do whatever it takes to do my best. And I know my best will often be poor for others. And that’s ok. I am not ice cream and I can’t please everyone. But I will continue to show up and give my best. I think, if I were around Steve, he would’ve fired me a hundred times for not being good enough!
Wait. I digressed. Like always. Back to reputation.
So what is reputation?
My loose definition is, what people think of you and describe you as when you are not in the room. Reputation is a proxy for trust. It dictates if others would want to engage with you or not. In the long-term, iterative and repetitive games of the world we live in (which is built on pillars of mistrust) get easier to play, better and more rewarding if your reputation is top-notch.
Think of Nath Saab. The fact that he stood around and acknowledged and did not run away adds to his reputation. I would love to be around such a man. You?
I understand that reputation is not merely about intent or actions. It’s often about outcomes. I know giving my best with my best intent may not translate into even average outcomes. And I am ok with it. I know this is counterintuitive and folks in this day and age only want to talk about what you get done this week.
I know that at C4E, I am pushing folks to talk about what they got done (and not what they did). I know this is hypocrisy at its very best. And I ok with it. I am trying to find a balance between the two. I want to push for greatness and yet I don’t want to break people along the way. And I am sure with time, I will find my way. Or maybe not. As long as I am standing with my spine straight, I am ok.
Coming to building, sustaining and growing reputation, I think the most important is what they call the 8th wonder of the world – compounding.
The way you behave, operate and act over time becomes your reputation. And then each act from thereon adds to it. And if you do it well, it compounds!
The scary part is, that the first time you defect, the reputation shatters. Think of glass. Once it’s got a crack, you can’t do anything about it. You have to start all over again. If you have the time left to start. And at my age, I dont have the time. So, I am very very protective of my reputation. Even at the cost of letting go of opportunities.
So, you must protect your reputation at any cost. Of course, there are exceptions (think businessmen, politicians, film stars and all that). Just that I am not an edge case, yet. I am at best a mid-wit at best and thus I need to work hard to build and uphold it. Nath Saab has built his over so many years with deliberate work and effort.
I did something similar a few weeks ago. I said no to something that I knew was a sure-shot way to make money and create impact but it would have meant that I would lose my reputation. Strangely it was just me (in a group of 10 other super smart folks) who thought that my reputation was at stake. Maybe if I were not a midwit, I would’ve taken the plunge! Anyhow. Different story for a different day.
Coming to reputation and lessons from Nath Saab.
As I try and scale C4E and see what else can we apply ourselves to, I think I need to be reminded of this reputation as the starting point and even the destination. And I think I would do well if at the age Nath Saab is at, I have a reputation like his.
With this, here’s a question and a request. This is an anonymous form you can fill in to give me feedback.
At C4E, I am going to adopt the leadership style of a benevolent dictator and this is my attempt at the rationale.
A few days ago I met this classmate from MDI that I hadn’t met since we passed out of there.
In these 18 years, he’s lost at least 18 KGs and I am guessing made more than 180 million dollars (in USD) as personal wealth. The first two numbers are real. The last number is my best guesstimate.
And thanks to his work, he’s got visibility with some of the most celebrated entrepreneurs from around the world. To the point that he knows many billionaires on a first-name basis. Which is great. But that’s not the point of this post. While talking, he used the term Benevolent Dictator.
And that is what the post is about.
Benevolent Dictator.
Of course, the term sounds fancy.
And it means fancy things as well.
And it looks fancy when looked at from the eyes of Chat GPT.
Chat GPT’s interpretation of a benevolent dictator
Back to my friend.
He explained what this term meant to him. And whatever he said made a lot of sense. I came back home and read more about it and I am so inspired by what I read that I am willing to change my leadership style!
If I were to define a benevolent dictator, I would lean on this definition I found online (I missed capturing the source)…
A ‘benevolent dictator’ does what he deems necessary ‘for the greater good’ of the state he rules over, or the nation he specifically belongs to. An ordinary ‘malevolent dictator’ has no such concerns and is only interested on keeping power on his hands for the kicks of it.
Source missing.
How would this awareness change me? What am I so inspired by?
Lemme try and explain and catalogue the changes that I would make in my life.
For starters, I am willing to admit that I am a leader (of at least C4E).
This is a far cry from what I’ve maintained all my life (that I am no leader per se and if at all I am one, I am at best a “servant leader” – a position of responsibility where my job is to support people in doing theirs well). I have never set directions, dictated targets, pushed for deadlines, asked to deliver or did anything that you would expect a typical “leader” to. I’ve worked to build consensus in each decision. I’ve operated from empathy, at the cost of topline and profits. I’ve had people make decisions and I’ve always used Bezos’ disagree and commit. If there’ve been times when I hated the decisions taken by our folks, I’ve remained stoic and told myself that this too shall pass. And it often passes. Now, I probably will get into nuance (in the video, Jeff mentions that he often commits because he’s able to trust others and they’ve been together for years and he’s seen their judgements turn out better etc etc) before I disagree and commit. I am getting too much into details but I hope the thought is clear.
Then, as I read more about benevolent dictators, I realised that almost all progress (good, bad or in between)- human, technological, philosophical, societal, or otherwise – was seeded by dictators.
Lemme lean on history here.
The ones who were not kind pushed and left their people in a mess, a ruin. There are quite a few examples. Hiter is often called a mad dictator. There’s a long list of tyrants. I am not as well-read to have a direct opinion.
The ones who were benevolent took their people to a place of prosperity, peace and progress. Most people agree that Singapore’s Lee Kuan Yew was a benevolent dictator who made Singapore what it is today – a developed, prosperous state. I read on Quora that Marcus Aurelius is also often regarded as a benevolent dictator. Of course, I am a fan of Aurelius and anything and everything he does is worth copying.
The absolute power that these dictators commanded allowed them to make decisions that they would otherwise not be able to make in a democracy where different powers move things in different directions. And in decision is where the progress is. In indecision, there’s only potential. And I believe that any progress, even if it’s in the negative zone, is better than potential. Another example – Steve was a dictator (he might or might now have been benevolent) and he made decisions that made Apple what Apple is.
Now with power and the ability to make decisions, you can either go mad or you can see Pale Blue Dot often and become a benevolent dictator.
So, if I want to create progress in my village, I need to be able to make bold decisions, at the cost of displeasing my people and living with the knowledge of those tough decisions.
This is also important to me at a personal level. Especially if I want C4E and myself to go from a mild success to a wild success.
So, what does ‘SG as a Benevolent Dictator’ mean for C4E?
Benevolent Dictator is made of two words – benevolent and dictator. Each is important. Allow me to write about those and find an answer.
Benevolence is top-down kindness that “rulers” often shower their people on. I dont agree with this idea of benevolence. I am no one to give kindness from top-down. I am one of the people who run the business. And at no point I want to “give” to anyone. My definition of benevolence means shared kindness, equity, freedom, independence, personal liberty and more.
Dictator is someone who has complete control, authority and autonomy to work in the way they deem fit. I like this definition. I want to be responsible for actions at C4E and the output of C4E. All this while, I wasn’t. I was at best one of the folks who would own a part of the output. Now, I will change this.
The dictator has some resources (people and otherwise) and they need to apply their brains, will, persuasion, connections, ideas and all that to get the best possible return. In most cases, the resources are scarce. At least in my case, they are. I need to put them to optimal use!
So, as the Benevolent Dictator at C4E, I need to marshall my resources and take all of us to prosperity. And while I do that I need to keep reminding myself that I am at the service of C4E.
So that.
What would change in how I run C4E?
Lemme start with a lesson that I learnt from Gokul. He envisions CynLr as a platform for opportunity exchange. I would like C4E to be the same. Further, in the words of Rajesh Sir, I want to be like a hose through which prosperity and opportunity flows. I want to give shoulders to people. And no, I do none of these with an altruistic intent. I know that kindness and getting people together is the best strategy for long-term, sustainable profitability and I want to do that.
I believe that at C4E, of all the people on the team, I am best equipped to take on this role and maximise outcomes. Hello, delulu 😀
And the change at C4E? Truth be told, I dont know this yet. These are some broad areas that I am thinking about.
A/ I would start asking for more accountability. This doesn’t mean people at C4E are not accountable – they are FAR more accountable than an average professional. Just that we tend to slack and take it easy at times. I need to fix that. And that fixing starts with me. I am the one that takes it easy the most.
B/ I would become more assertive. It may sound stupid but at this time, I am NOT assertive at all. Like I said earlier, I believe in disagree and commit. I from now on will probably disagree, overrule and act. This would be tough, to be honest, but let’s see how this works. I also run the risk of wasting time on managing egos and all that. But let’s see how it pans out.
C/ I will say no to more things My default state has been hell yes to each thing that I come across. And I want that to remain the case. However, I will ask my people to say no more often. And I will ask them to channelise their energies. I can the be the one that wanders all the time but I will need people to stick to things and take them to conclusion.
What would NOT change?
I know that the one thing that will NOT change at C4E is the freedom that people enjoy to work however they want to, where they want to, with who they want to will not change. This value of freedom is at the very core of what C4E is and I would not change that for anything.
Other things may change. I dont have a thought. I will think more over the next few days and add those here.
Finally, what do I need to be careful about as a benevolent dictator?
Since I’ve read some about benevolent dictators. I have a ready list of things that I need to skirt from. Here in bullets…
The lust for power. And the corruption by power. After a point, you tend to enjoy power and you want to enjoy power for power’s sake. I need to keep this at the back of my head that I am merely a servant for C4E who is working as a benevolent dictator to make things happen.
The sense of invincibility that comes with power (and control). I need to know that I am human and fallible. I do not want to ever get swayed by the inflated ego that the power would give me.
The loss of benevolence. The loss of humility that has made me what I am. If I had to choose between benevolence or dictatorship, I would choose the former.
The plundering of gains that I get out of running C4E as a dictator. This would be the most unfortunate outcome. C4E is a village and each thing that at least I earn needs to go to help C4E thrive.
So, that.
Guess this is it. Let’s see how I go from there in my new experiment. More later!
Notes, thoughts and musings after I read the Steve Jobs archive. And how I apply what I read to C4E.
So, they released the Steve Jobs archive a few days ago and I’ve spent the last few days reading it. And I have been taking notes in terms of the kind of company I want to build at C4E. We are today a communications collective. Tomorrow we could be something else. But the ethos and values and the very fabric of the company has to be in place! Of course, it will evolve but the entire evolution also needs a genesis. And thus this effort on reading and taking notes.
While the actual notes I took remain alive in the email archives of people at C4E, what I share here is a slightly redacted version. Removed names, specific incidents and all that.
Enjoy!
This is part 1 that I read / thought / wrote on a flight to Bangkok. Have fixed typos, grammar and redacted a few things. Have added underlines, bold text and other formatting things.
Hi!
Hello hello. This is your captain speaking. Lol. I was trying to sound like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible 4.
This will be a long email. Bear with me. Havent written a long one in a while. So I may be rusty. And there will be multiple threads.
ONE. WHY ARE WE HERE?
Here – earth. Here – with each other. Here – at C4E.
The answer to me is clear. In my head and in my heart. We are here to ensure that we have the time of our lives. And no, not in the hedonistic revelry drunken stupor manner. But in the way we learn, grow, expand our potentials and more.
I hope this is known to each of you. If not clear already. And if any of you is here for anything but this, then you are in the wrong place and I have set the wrong expectations. So, if you are here for money, for building your resume, for a chill workplace, please revisit your decision. Sorry if I sound harsh but as we scale it will be incredibly tough to keep pace. Oh, and this is a good time to do so. I will put ourselves on a very fast-track path to growth and I will demand a lot. And of course, I will take care of all of us.
Thing is, we are a community of high-functioning individuals, each accountable to everyone else, with infinite trust in each other. “We” comes before “I”. Always. And I really think a lot about that para from Will Smith’s book that talks about his love language being the one of growth and abundance and progress and action and collective. That is exactly my love language. And since all of you are fairly young (including P and P), I’d advocate you all to have the same. Keyword is advocate. Not mandate. Cool?
Coming back to learning, growing, expanding potential and all that, this can only happen if we are one with each other. This oneness is a very vague concept. And it’s impossible to get in that space – we live in different places, our lives are different, our tastes are different and so on and so forth. But since we are one in our mission (to live the best version of our lives and not make work our cages) and vision (make a dent in the universe in our own way), there is some degree of one-ness that we can achieve. And we must try harder each day to be there. We are in what Steve described Reed College as…
I have stopped counting the number of times other people tell us that we vibe well with each other and we operate well as a team. So that’s a good place. We need to find our Mahabharata that ensures that we are financially free. And then life can be so much more enriching and beautiful.
Oh, I hope you understand what we do right now is only to make ends meet and survive? We don’t have the ambition to be just a creative services company. We can sure be a creative products company where we make our things and sell but we don’t want to rent our time to write copy and design things or project manage. It’s a matter of time before we stop what we are doing (even if it will scale in the next few months). We really need money to experiment. Fuel, you know.
See this…
Also see this…
So that.
TWO. STEVE.
Ok, so on the flight I read Steve Jobs book. And I cried. For two reasons.
A, The guy is brilliant and I never had the chance to see him. And I will never be like him and I will never have the impact that he’s had on the world. Second, a lot of things he talks about, well, have knowingly or unknowingly inspired me do to do things.
B, You know how each time we find something incredible about running a business, I realise that we already have something similar. This means only one thing. That we are destined to do well. If not as a business, as a team. And individually for sure.
C, He literally predicted AI!
D. Who do you work for?
Even though Steve says this..
My answer is different.
You don’t work for SG. You don’t work for C4E. You don’t work for anyone else. You only work for yourself. And that is extremely important. If you think you work for SG / C4E / Anyone else, you are wrong. You work for yourself. And thus you need to make this place, make all of us the best set of people to work with. And be around!
THREE. GROWTH SESSIONS
I want to change the format. Each alternate week, we would get a guest to talk to us about what they do. Starting next week. C, ask me about it. And we’d write a blogpost on it.
FOUR. CALIFORNIA
We HAVE to be a virtual California. Experimenting. Planting bombs. Open. Inviting. Creating new possibilities. Again, planting bombs.
FIVE. PEOPLE / HIRING PODCAST
Here is what I want to do.
Record a live podcast. With all of you in live audience (on Zoom). And I will invite AD to interview me on building teams. And each time I say something that you think I am faffing or we don’t do, PLEASE interrupt. C – ask everyone for their calendar. Including AD. Lets try to do this on Sunday the 23rd. I want Poo to be around as well so see timezones.
Oh, here’s Steve…
SIX. Coke
Just had regular coke on the flight. Love the taste!
SEVEN. CHARACTER.
Enough said…
EIGHT. GRATITUDE
You must read this exchange between Steve and Andy (Intel guy).
Funny that we face this in our lives these days. Where people want to be paid for their time and do not understand that in the long-term this shortsightedness of charging for time and expertise from friends is a bad idea.
NINE. Similarity with C4E. Bored of using caps
TEN: MISTAKES AND REGRETS
ELEVEN: AI
What AI is doing is what computers did. Made people do more things. You did not have to learn programming to use a comp. With AI, you don’t have to learn art.
12. ON WORK-LIFE BALANCE. I did type in caps. Lol
You know my stand on it. You don’t have to agree with it. But Steve agrees with me 😀
Also read his thoughts on why you ought to NOT have a “career”. Also see this TED talk by Larry Smith.
13. On contracts and why I don’t generally trust paperwork (but will increasingly rely on documentation)
I want you to see the highlighted part only. Rest is context.
Also see the last pars on the right hand side. “I sort of feel like I work for most of these people because they’re the ones that are doing all the brilliant work.”
Who does this sound like? 😀
14. SoG to CoG. F*@K!
From Shoulders of Giants to in Company of Giants!
This never ever occurred to me till I read this page. Its incredible. Amongst you I am in the company of giants. Each of you is a giant in your own right even if you are all but 18. The page is about a book called Company of Giants where Steve gave an interview. He never used the word Company of Giants per se in it but it sparked an epiphany and this is what I am writing on. So, two things.
1/ We’ve always imagined that we are on the shoulders of giants. This comes from my core belief that I am not a giant and I have a lot to do. But I also miss the point that I could be a giant to some for sure. You know, the ones that are yet to get as old as me. So at least I can qualify as a giant. And this is true for each of you. You may be young but you can do teach a lot of things to a lot of people and they can benefit from your experience. And that’s amazing. So, we are essentially all giants with the awareness that we can and must grow more. No?
So, we are essentially giants on the shoulders of other giants.
And no, being a giant does not mean we stop learning, we stop trying, we stop doing more things. Or doesn’t mean that we become arrogant, know it alls. We can’t be that. There is no way you know it all. Need to ensure that doesn’t change. Also see this…
What do you think is the most important part of this email? Reply to me. And only to me. I will know if you’ve tolerated this email 😉
2/ Now that I have learnt that we could be giants, we need to do more from there on. With giantdom comes giant responsibility. To remain a giant that others in your company respect. So hold yourself to a higher standard. Do more than what you would otherwise do. There is no right way to talk about more but I hope you understand.
3/ Bonus. As giants, we HAVE to be very very very very very… cant stress enough about who we allow to be in our company. We have to continue to get absolutely the best to work alongside us. We have to be that exclusive group that is incredibly tough to get in. And once someone is in, they remain for life. Even if they stop working for us. Our gatekeeping is not for work. It’s for life. And while we will have people falling through the crevices of life (see my last few tweets before take off), we need to continue to take care of them (and theirs – the people that they love). More on this some other day. But the point being, lets be choosy. There is no way we will not have absolutely the best around us.
Also, in the same chapter, I need to up my game in the threatening department. No?
Ok, that’s it! I need to turn off the laptop.
The book is still half-read. My reading speed is slow :d
Rest of the email when I take the flight from BKK to India. But in the meanwhile, do read this and think and reflect.
Love you all,
SG
PS: Now you know why am dangerous on a plane. And what I am capable of without internet.
This is part 2 that I read / thought / wrote on a flight to Bangalore.
I thought I had sent this email once I landed in Bangalore but it never went. I opened my notes for the third part of the email and I realised I hadn’t sent it. So here it is. A lot of book is still left. Let’s see what I cover on this flight (UK866 to Bom).
Read on…
Ok, captain is back. Lol. No captain. Your chaperone is back. The one that doesnt speak to Prak well. So onto the next part of the book.
15/ Steve’s Job
Steve Jobs’ job was – “number one, recruit; number two, set an overall direction; and number three, inspire and cajole and persuade.”
I think I will spend more and more time on the first one.
The second I dont know how to do.
Third I dont do at all – I am capable of and I will increasingly start doing. While I will do this for things that I control a tad more (DD and not P3), you will see me doing a lot more of this. At no point we mean that we will not retain our independence but I hope you get the drift.
16/ Team
He said, “It is always a team of people, and the chemistry between that team of people, that makes great results”
Well. If I said that I’ve been saying this exact thing for a long time now, will you believe me? Lol!
17/ Steve’s Values
Though this has not been articulated in as much detail and I may be wrong but this is it…
“Life is short; don’t waste it. Tell the truth. Technology should enhance human creativity. Process matters. Beauty matters. Details matter. The world we know is a human creation—and we can push it forward.”
This is Steve. I dont know what my values are TBH. Except that I like to be independent and free. I like the idea of enabling people. But I am not sure if that is my value. I think I need to action this and discover my values. Let’s see when I do that and what those values would be. You people know me from unclose. Lemme know what you think my values are.
You know, when he died, I remember clearly. It was morning our time. I was sleeping. My ex called me said if I had seen news. And I asked what happened. She said Steve had passed. And I remember I cried. F*#k as I write this, I have lump in my throat and my eyes have welled. The point is, I am emotional. Not about my family or friends or you. But about Steve. A stranger that was a monster. Cos that is what I have pegged my entire life to. And you can probably see my attempts to ape him. Attempts to be a fanboy of what he created. I dont know why am writing this but it just came.
No, I dont want people to cry when I die. And I know I will die in anonymity. Once I am old, I will fade away to some obscure jungle. I dont want no one to see me as frail and all that. My memory has to be that of a person in control. Ok digressing. Lol.
So Steve. When he died, one of the eulogies said that the greatest contribution of the man and the greatest irony is that the news of a person’s death was consumed by millions around the world on the very device he helped create. Now that’s impact. What a f**king guy!
4/ Giving a shit about?
See this…
Steven P Jobs (guess what’s P? And see a TED talk where Larry something is talking about how you’d fail to have a career like Steven P) gave a shit about Apple and he ensured that he had to do whatever he could to ensure that it does well. I give a shit about each of you here, even though I may not agree to anyone. And I hope each of you gives a shit about each other. And that means we need to ensure we do whatever it takes to help each other run our lives better.
18/ “A More Entrepreneurial Apple”
This talks about what he announced to people
So, inspired from this part. I will work on stock options for all of us. Even SJ, AK and V. I dont know the shape but we will work on this. I know you know that all of us get compensated when we have the money but I want more participation in rewards for all of you. Myra’s part remains unchanged. Whatever stock comes in, comes from my part. Will work on this.
TBH I dont like to cede control over how I run. May be that’s why we are still small and all? That I have not been able to give control?
Oh, we need “all hands on deck” for the next few months. More on this later.
19/ On deciding to not sell Apple
Read this.
Steve loved to walk. I love to talk at cafes. The point is, f2f. In person. Not over camera. For starters, C, I need you in Bom. Lets accelerate.
Wait walk was not the point. The point was, he believed that despite the shit that people did, he wanted to do things. Not for people. But for what he believed. In our case we are WAAAY better. There’s nothing wrong in what we do or who we are. Just that we need to ensure that we dont get this complacent.
20/ Challenges.
I hope none of you have stopped challenging me. This is also the reason why I ran that 2 question survey. I may be stubborn and have a lot of preconceived notions about things but I really enjoy the banter and questions that people ask me. I am not as patient as Steve is. Once I know someone is not getting the intent with which I am talking, I give up. That intent is the starting point. The details is something I am ok to let go. I hope I am making sense here.
Here’s a thing that I will add to my weekly review. What notion of mine was challenged by the team this week?
21/ Focus
His entire third act is about focus. And I think I need to bring that in my life. And in the lives of all of us. Let’s see how. Any thoughts?
22/ Brand C4E
If Steven can be concerned about complacency for Apple’s brand, we HAVE to be VERY mindful.
[REDACTD]
Sorry if I am harsh but this obsessiveness over brand, especially our own, needs to be there. For clients, they are happy with good being done better than their existing standards. We need to outrank our own standards each time.
Ready Fire Aim is great. Planing bombs is excellent. But do we want to plant a bomb in our own home? Do we want to open fire in our own backyard?
23/ C4E’s core belief
He says, “But Apple is about something more than that. Apple, at the core—its core value—is that we believe that people with passion can change the world for the better. That’s what we believe.”
What is our core belief?
I think it would be similar. That people want to live their best lives and while they do so, they want to do meaningful work. And once work has meaning, people do magic.
No it’s not as sharp as Apple’s. But we will find that out. We will craft it. But till the time we get there, we need to be obsessive about rallying as well as we can.
24/ Here’s to the crazy ones…
Here’s an experiment. I used to remember the lines verbatim. I am going to type those without seeing the lines.
Here’s to the crazy ones. The rebels. The misfits. The troublemakers. The rounds pegs in square holes. The ones that have no respect for the status quo. You can laugh at them, disagree with them, vilify them or ridicule them. But there’s one thing you can never do. You can’t ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Cos the ones that are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, actually do.
And here’s the actual one.
“Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently. They’re not fond of rules. And they have no respect for the status quo. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them. About the only thing you can’t do is ignore them. Because they change things. They push the human race forward. And while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius. Because the people who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do.”
I need to do this pronto. The forest that we remind ourselves from time to time.
26/ Design
I can NOT stress enough that we need design chops. We’ve been trying hard to find someone but I dont have the money to compensate. More than the money I dont have anyone that sees like the way I do. There’s V but she’s in Kol. Need someone to handhold me and help me with design. There is so much we can do if we can pull this design thingy!
Each product we make, each thing we sell has to be design first. And no, not quirky design that pleases us and our evolved sensibility but what we can share with the world that the world accepts. You know how high fashion is good and all but in the end people go to basic H&M and Zara and Bata and all. That. We may have our own quirks and likes and all but in the end there has to be a commercial angle to design.
27/ Gap
What gap are we bridging? Apple bridged this gap…
What bridge are we building? Who are we enabling? Apple enabled following..
28/ Excellence
Remember, we are as good as our last delivery.
Ok, taking off. More later.
This is part 3 that I read / thought / wrote on a flight to Bombay.
Hello!
Part 3 of the epic Steve Jobs book thingy. Before anything, question. Do you think we should make this open source? As in publish this on C4E blog? Or will it become way too self indulgent? Batao batao. Tell tell.
Ok coming to the book.
29/ Golden Age.
He says, “Our real Golden Age is being fueled by the maturing of our people.” When we get to golden age of C4E, it will be brought about by EACH of you becoming giants. I dont like words like mature etc. But growth. I hope you understand.
He also talks about more and more people coming from behind them. That’s what we need to start. While we will add more people, we need all of us to get the next generation ready. And no, not in terms of age but in terms of how well they understand who we are.
30/ On optimism
I think it’s incredibly useful to be optimistic in life. This quote reminded me of this – “One of my favorite quotes from him is where he says that optimism is the essential ingredient for innovation.”
You know, how I say, I am glass half-full person and how I say it will happen with time. All of us need to be that. Optimistic. But at the same time paranoid. Should never rest on the laurels of the past. Must always want to do more.
31/ Three things.
Steve on Bob Noyce (intel) – “His job was to, number one, recruit; number two, set an overall direction; and number three, you know, inspire and cajole and persuade.”
I think I am on to this already. I have yet to work on the direction part. I dont know how to cajole / persuade or whatever. But I think I know this mantra. I need to do better. What do you people think?
32/ Buy people lunches.
Each of you can use this ruse. You are young. Send those cold emails. Buy people lunches.
Also, as I read this chapter, I am inspired to see all that happens in SV. I think I really missed that :(. I think all of us must be at the epicentre of action. Am lucky to be at Mumbai. I have failed at making a network in Bangalore. I would kill to be 20 year old in US / San Francisco. Sigh. See this next para. I couldn’t even comprehend it! I mean it’s so deep. The entire thing about tricks being there for one-time performance and the loss of novelty. Uff. How dare they have such writing prowess and clarity? Prak help me write like that!
33/ Why Apple Stores are at places like BKC and Saket?
34/ On people and hiring.
This is THE most important distinction that we need to make when we hire. This entire page should be crammed up like you would do to a poem you love!
Also I am noticing that Steve’s thoughts in the later years are lot more “practical”. I mean see the progression from the three emails I’ve sent you ;P
No?
35/ Management by Values.
Thing is am finding the same piece of advice over and over again. Or I am merely reading the same things over and over again. Look at this line – “He called it management by values. What that means is you find people that want the same things you want, and then just get the hell out of their way.”
I mean come on! Thank C4E. We want ethos. We want alignment on culture book. We want people that want same things like us. And then I am saying I need to get out of the way!!
36/ Why I am BIIIIIIG on even the subtle signs of creeks coming up in our culture / communication etc.
Read the following para.
For context, he talks about how a tiny word in the way management thought at Apple made Apple into a bad place from great. And he spotted it as soon as he was back. And now he’s talking about that subtlety is not really to be ignored. Plus he’s talking about alignment on why / values / rason d etie (whatever that word is).
And the matra part that got clipped in the image above – he says, “And that’s one of my mantras around Apple and Pixar: that recruiting is the most important thing that you do. Finding the right people—that’s half the battle.”
😀
37/ Not sure of what I think of this. Opinion?
38/ Teacher
“a teacher is someone who stands with you in the dark and holds their flashlight just long enough for you to find your own flashlight.”
This is the best damn definition of teacher I have ever seen!
39/ Urgency
Remember my fascination with the sense of urgency and yet my inability to push it? I got reminded of that again with this quote – “what can be left to later, usually is — and then, alas, it’s too late.”
You will see me pushing for a lot more things to be done faster. Please be warned. And this passing of Sid Rao (even though I did not know him personally) has been hard on me. I looked upto him and he was my age.
40/ PLAN TO MEET PEOPLE
I read this and had goosebumps. This is where he’s talking about meeting his future wife. No, am not sure if he was a great husband, but this para spoke to me!
The point is, you can NOT plant to meet the people that will change your life – I did not plan to meet R, S, R Sir, any of you and yet once I met, I knew each of these would play a role in my life and I recognised and I went ahead and literally begged and did whatever I could to be in their life and be of service to them. I am sure I have missed having the clarity of mind on a lot of people. But I increasingly try to evaluate each person as one of the two – a, someone who I can give some input and may be help shape their lives and b, can that person be impactful in my life?
And when I see that my answer is yes to the above question, I put in the effort to be their friend and show them my love / affection / attention. I speak in the love language of having everyone make money together etc etc.
You know all those ABC kids that I was spending time with? Those SoG kids? I really think I could add a lot to D, S, S, A, A, N, N, V, AK etc. And each of you knows amount of effort (time, money, energy, personal equity) I put in to earn their respect etc. But I failed, except maybe with AK. Or a bit with V. The point is not my failure. The point is, I need to get more convincing in my communication. And more importantly, when I spot a giant that I could stand on the shoulder of, I need to drop everything and persuade them to start liking me. Ajeet Sir is one (C met him the other day). I do so so so so much for him. And yet he refuses to accept me. I am willing to submit to him. But no. He won’t accept me.
Similarly, each of you needs to find YOUR people that will change your life. I hope all of us can change of each of us. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE go forth and find more people. And if your interactions allow you to recognise that they can change your life, PLEASE do whatever it takes to stick to them. C – A could be for you. AC – P could be for you.
41/ Why I invest in C4E / SoG / etc
I did not invest in a house, a car or anything. Heck, [REDACTED]. Why? Think and tell me.
And no, not trying to [REDACTED]. It’s a fact. Stating like a fact. And hoping for a straight answer, like you would respond to a non-emotional, rational, facts-first question.
Fun fact – I did not know that Steve wrote the Stanford speech himself. I assumed someone would’ve written for him, the way most people get their things done. And he took 6 months!! FCUK!!
42/ The missing BEST thing from the actual speech!!!
I dont know why Steve did not include this in his speech. This is THE BEST DAMN advice I’ve EVER read ANYWHERE. NOT KIDDING. READ!
LIFE AS A STORY IN THE MAKING! FUAAAK!
What makes your heart sing? F#$K!
And you know what, I am so so so so lucky that I think 18 years of my story is amazing so far. I have 10 more years to go till am 50. Am going to make the next 10 the best song that the heart knows. Come sing with me. Tell me your song. Let’s make a symphony of our song. I am sure there could be a case of Miley Spears or whatever that lady AK is fan of and Lucky Ali and Eminem and a dog barking coming together to create music!
No?
Ok that’s about it from this flight. There is one more part coming in. I will send it this week and then we can chat. Till then, over and out.
This is part 4 that I read / thought / wrote at a Starbucks.
So, I had to get over with this. The book is almost done and needs just an hour more. And right now am parked at a Starbucks and I have time till 12. So, I thought, why not?
I do have a flight on Friday (to Goa :D) and I could have used that time. But no, too far.
Let’s go!
43/ Charm
This is a quote from Bill Gates about Steve Jobs when Jobs was sitting right next to him. I dont know what you see. But I see charm. And all of us need to learn that!
44/ The kind of things we want to use ourselves.
THIS IS EXACTLY what I have been trying to do with C4E. And all of you. I know modern work is broken. I don’t know if I can fix it for large sets of people. But I can fix it for myself and the ones around me. And that’s what I am onto.
I want to build a structure where I can thrive and feel free and do things that I want to. Of course, I want to make money and enjoy the richness that life has to offer. Of course, we have to work incredibly hard, harder than the average Joe and Jane and Them next door. But it has to be at my own term. With the confidence that life could be full of people where we talk to each other with respect and start and end at that.
I hope each of you sees this. And each of you wants to build this place into a kind of place that you’d like to welcome your friends and family into!
45/ Look at the future. Not past.
In hindi we say, jo beet gayi so baat gayi.
Each of us – whatever has happened in the past need to learn from that and move on. Don’t let it linger. Think what can you do next. Life is what’s happening to you now and what will happen to you in the future.
46/ Sic Transit Gloria
47/ As good as the last thing
I know I have shared this already (point 28) but I thought I will share it again. See and internalise.
48/ Shoulder of giants
These are indeed very simple words but very very deep. That’s the point of it. Things are simple. We read them at a superficial level. And then we forget about those. However, to appreciate them really well, like REALLY well, you need to be clear in the head. This is what Steve was probably going for. I cant say I understand and I get what he was on but this is very very useful to read.
49/ One more thing
I don’t know how many of you know the “one more thing” thing but read about it (here).
Let’s POKE life. We’ve done that a lot already. Can we do more? Can we change it for better? Life is a gift and our gift has come with considerable privilege. Each of us acknowledges it and knows about it. Why would we then not chase a higher-order thingy? C4E and communication and all that will happen. But can there be more? Can we all uplift self and others?
On this Thursday’s growth session, I will talk about this.
PS: These Thursday sessions are where we at C4E do an open-house conversation of sorts where we invite someone to speak about an idea / thought that is worth knowing. If you’d like an invite, please write to us at @c4ein.
The tweet is a quote by NN Taleb and it says, “Mild success can be explainable by skills and labor. Wild success is attributable to variance.”
Side Note. NN Taleb is one of the most influential thinkers of contemporary times. His concepts on Black Swan, Antifragile and Skin in the Game have shaped my thinking and my approach to work. Oh, and I have the rare distinction of being blocked by him!
B. A conversation with AS that made me think hard about the kind of things I want to do in life. He asked me what was my grand plan for life. And while I have thought often and thought hard about this, I was for the first time that I could put it in words. Thank You, AS for asking that question.
So, while thinking of the answer, I knew that I wanted to be a Wildly Successful person (and not just a mildly successful one).
And what is this Wildly Successful person?
Lemme start by defining the two.
Mild success is a few millions, some cars, luxurious life, respect from your peers, considerable impact within your community and so on and so forth.
Example? CEOs like Indira Nooyi. These people rest on the laurels of an organisation where they “work” and paddle carbonated water.
Wild success is billions, irreverence for cars or luxury, actions that impact the whole of humanity and like Steve said, the ability to push the human race forward!
Example? CEOs like Steve Jobs. These people actually created products that have enabled almost all creative people to do more.
Thing is, Indira Nooyi could do so well because she was and is smarter than your average business executive and she worked really hard and stayed on the course. Most of my classmates from MDI would chart the same path to being mildly successful. They are smart, work hard and are on their way to the top of their corporate ladders. By itself, it’s not a wrong thing, to be honest. Who doesn’t like 2 cars, 2 houses, 2 kids, 2 house helps, 2 club memberships et al?
But then, this life is not for me.
I’d rather be Steve. Steve Jobs could get wildly successful because of what he worked on, how he worked, the kind of things he did, the decisions he made and all that gave him that shot at sending the ball out of orbit (and not just the park). And while he did all that, he had his quirks, he lived life on her terms, and he chase things that he believed were right. And along the way, inspired others.
Of course, he got lucky. Numerous times. Luck had to play a part in his wild success but the path he was on was not going to ever make him just mildly successful. It was either going to be wild. Or it was going to take him to ruin. Something Elon stands for. Even Warren for that matter.
So that!
Wait. Is there a lesson? Is there a point to this post?
So, the lesson thus ladies and gents is twofold.
A. Understand what kind of success you chase. Wild. Mild. I know I do. You?
B. Once you know what you are chasing (mild or wild), if you are chasing, look at what others in the same league (mild or wild) did and then tread the same path.
It is that simple! Rest is a function of effort, consistency, time, luck and variance. Over and out!
Lemme know what you think.
PS: When I thought about I'd like to become wildly successful and when I thought about the kind of people I think I want to become (I will not get into details but some people that I want to be like are Chris Sacca, Tim Ferriss, Naval Ravikant, Jason Calacanis, Chamath Palihapitiya and others), I realised that there is a clear pattern. These people have a LOT in common. Here's a small list...
- Great deal-making ability
- Envious network. Especially, a large set of loose connections that are willing to look past the biases that close friends may have
- Ability to communicate well
- The knack of spotting trends
- A very big bias towards action
- High-agency
I am sure there are more things that I can't spot right now. Just that to be able to create this variance that takes from your mild to wild, you ought to at least have what these guys have. Get the drift?
A longish post about how I spent the day yesterday, things I did and how I felt as I went about them.
8:29. Was up a few minutes ago. Made my bed, opened the windows, got some water, and switched on the computer. And here I am. I will try to write this one without switching context. Let’s see how I fare. I will keep a tab of interruptions and what triggered that.
Yesterday was interesting for a lot of reasons. Lemme recap and then I will write more. So for starters, I went to Starbucks and spent almost half a day there. More on this in a bit. Then I came back and ate (once in the day! yay!). Remember the keyboard I wrote about? I found it! Wedged next to the bookshelf! Then I worked and worked and worked and worked till about 10. And then I slept. While sleeping, I felt like a machine that started in the morning, worked till the day ended, and then shut down. The joy felt missing. I mean the joy is in work itself, to be honest, and I enjoy most things I do. But as I was trying to get sleep (around 11), I wished there was more. May be this is the loneliness that they talk about that people my age suffer from? You know, the ones that don’t have a significant other? I won’t know.
Moving to specifics.
Starbucks. So I went to the Starbucks I go to often. I got myself a Venti Americano and settled into the spot that I used to sit at. In the first 10 minutes while I was there, I realized it was going to be a good good day. In the sense that I will get a lot done. I will be in the zone. I will do better things.
And I did. I felt the spring in my step. I made difficult calls. I was on a literal roll!
Now that I know this and it has dawned onto me this well, I think wherever I go, I will have to find a place like Starbucks to work from. I will invest in a place (as in pay a fee or something). May be a WeWork. It would become a large variable when I choose the place where I want to be. When in Goa, even Clay was not plush enough for my taste. Felix probably was. Just that phone / Internet wouldn’t work there. Plus those places are not built for virtual calls.
Oh, and I will start calling this the ‘Starbucks Effect on Work’. Related is Coffee Effect on Sleep. Like I couldn’t fall asleep easily last night when I tried. And then I woke during the night. Guess that’s all the coffee in me playing a spoilsport.
Next up. Now that I am fully vaccinated and all that, I plan to be in Delhi for a few days towards the end of Jun. I know my work would get affected while I am there – I won’t have the space to work from and I would have to live in a small house with my parents. But I think my parents deserve a break and work can wait. No, they’ve not told me that they want me to live with them. It’s just that I want to. Most times, I make more than 6 trips to Delhi a year. This time around, it’s been tough. I remember I was in Delhi in March of last year. And then around Diwali. It’s been more than 7 months and I think I owe them one. So that.
In other news, I saw that Vikramaditya Motwane Sir is doing a session where he would listen to pitches from aspiring authors. I think I will participate in that and try my luck. In case you are a filmmaker and reading this by mistake, do see this. In fact, thanks to TRS sessions, I have come to love what he’s as a person. I am lucky that I get some behind-the-scenes time with him and thus I know that he’s probably one of the best-meaning filmmakers that I know of. I must must make friends with him. If only wishes had wings!
Finally, the thing that I want to write about is WWDC21. Apple’s flagship event for developers. While I did not catch the event per se but the buzz made me stop and see what all they presented. And it’s amazing how they do it. They make seemingly simple things sound so grand that you are left in awe. I think there are a lot of lessons in there for me as a person, for brands, and for businesses. I mean see the below two videos and tell me you are not impressed!
Day 1 recap
Day 2 recap
Damn Steve! What a brilliant organization you created! I am in perpetual awe of you.
Ok, the other person that I want to talk about who I am in awe of? Jeff Bezos! He announced that he’s going to space. In a rocket that one of his companies designed. Along with his brother. I mean WTF! The most epic example of eating your own shit! A part of me is amazed at his dareness. Another part is scared. What if something happens? I mean the odds are pretty high! We lost Steve randomly. Dont think I want to lose Jeff. Or Bill. Or Warren for that.
I know I know I am trying to abstain from Hero Worship but these are the men that actually show others (and more importantly me) that there’s more to life than Ram Mandir! I sincerely wish I end up like that – where my conduct and my life and my work inspires others.
But wait. What about the epic laziness that I am ingrained with? Lemme give an example. Last night, once I was done with all the work and wailing in my loneliness (that I wrote about above), I realized that I don’t have water. And I drink a lot of water. Like a lot. Some 10 liters a day. I am not exaggerating. So I needed water. And I did have a 20-liter jar that I just had to open and pour into a dispenser. And what did I do? Ordered 4 1-liter bottles of water. Such a waste of money and plastic. Only to save me the discomfort of pouring water into a dispenser. Lol!
Ok. After this 10,000 kilometers of a rant, coming to the real thing that I am thinking a lot about. My angel investing syndicate that I am doing with Akash and Anubhab. We call itLong Haul Ventures (LHV).
The thesis there is simple. We want to be long-term partners for young founders that often find themselves alone. You know the ones that aren’t from an IIT-IIM etc. The ones that dont really have a pedigree to gather interest for the bets they are making. The ones that often find themselves alone and in a corner. I don’t want to call them underdogs. Idea is to give them a shoulder to stand on!
It’s been my life’s mission to enable others to do more. LHV is yet another step in that direction. This time, in a little more structured manner. With people who are smarter than me (both share initials – AG and AG). And of course, for the super long-term. Most of the work I will do on LHV will reap fruits after 5-10 years. But I am committed. With my time, money, energy, and even reputation.
So, while there are a few long-term goals we are chasing, I do have a short-term objective to meet as well. I am helping close the first deal by helping a startup raise capital.
And I am learning that it’s tough as fuck! Tougher than raising money for your own startup. For your startup, the friends and family that invest in? They are backing you and your passion and your dreams. Here, they are backing a stranger’s dream and all they have is your word!
Each person you ask for money (and support the startup) has a million questions about you and your thesis and all that. The questions are deep and pointed (as they must be) and they make you feel naked. You have to bare your heart and soul. Some of these questions are so tough that you don’t know what to say. But you need to do it. Right? Yeah!
So that. It’s a new thing and I know it’s a long, hard road I am on. Let’s see how long can I tread on it.
Guess that’s about it. It’s 9:24. A little less than an hour. And 1400 words! Wow! Maybe I had a lot to write. Or may be I did not switch context a lot. Oh, I kept a list. Here…
Music (needed something to play in the background)
Whatsapp (had to ask a few friends about a trip before I goto Delhi)
Someone at the door
Well done, Mr. Garg. You deserve a break! Go call your Pavlovian response mechanism to go berserk.
You, dear reader, deserve a break as well. Go, live your best life.
PS: Here’s streaks…
Morning Pages / Meditations – 178
#aPicADay – 0
10K steps a day – 0
OMAD – 1. Did not plan to. It just happened.
#noCoffee – 0
#noCoke – 90
10 mins of meditation – 0
#book2 – 0
Killer Boogie – 0
Surya Namaskar – 0
PPS: And here’s what Hemingway has to say about this piece…
A short post about my understanding of life and death. No, it’s not very rosy.
7:10 AM Yesterday was weird. For some reason, I could not function. I was on the computer since the morning but I could not function at all. I was like a zombie. I was not thinking, not reacting, not doing. I was on a computer On one side, I am chilling with the two kids I adore more than anything else in life. And on another, someone close in the extended family passed away. I have known him to be a funny, respectful, and full of life person. I think I’ve even gone on holidays with him as a kid – you know when you’d pack yourself into a big car and would go in large groups to hill stations? That. While there is some sort of sadness over the passing of the said relative, I am more or less. To a point that apart from that momentary thought about him and how he looked and who all do I know from the family, I had no feeling of loss. To be honest, I’ve felt a far more personal loss at the passing of celebrities that I did not know of. Heck, I was disturbed by days when I heard about the passing of Steve Jobs. Even the scandals about Jeff and Bill. I was more fucked in the head when one of my colleagues passed away and even when one of my poker buddies passed away (even though I hadn’t heard from him in years).
I am not sure if I should be ashamed of this indifference towards someone who was close. Or I should be proud of my indifference towards someone who was close. I don’t know. I just know that death is messy and I am severely unequipped to handle the emotions that it invokes. To me, despite COVID, death has remained an academic thing. That happens to others, in books, and in popular media. This time I have lost people that are close and that I have spoken to and shared meals with and all that. And yet I remain emotionless. May be such is life. Such is the world. May be Steve was right all along. He said, “Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”
Today’s Saturday. And that means a lot of distractions won’t be around. Plus I have been slacking for some days now. I will probably pull my socks and get more things done. I will also try and work out from a friend’s place to prevent myself from plopping myself on a bed. I am sick and tired of working from home. I need a change in scenery for sure. I miss going to an office, I miss the energy of others. I can’t wait for a Starbucks to open. I can’t wait for the lockdown to go away. The way things are stacked in Mumbai, I think we would be out of the lockdown by the first week of June. I am so so so looking forward to it.
Guess this is it. There’s more to write but I will take a pause and do some Surya Namaskars. Been a few days.
Here’s the streak…
Morning Pages / Meditations – 160
#aPicADay – 0
10K steps a day – 0
OMAD – 0
#noCoffee – 3
#noCoke – 72
10 mins of meditation – 0
#book2 – 0
Killer Boogie – 0
Surya Namaskar – 0
PS: Today on, I will try and title the post with what’s on my mind.
In this 30-seconds-to-read post, I talk about ‘The Rule of Three’ in Writing. A simple tool that you can use to become far better at writing!
Here’s a question to get you started.
What is common to the following?
Roti, Kapda and Makaan Satyam, Shivam, Sundaram Blood, Sweat, and Toil Aap, Main aur Bagpiper Mind, Body, Soul I, Me, Myself Dharti, Paatal, Aakash Etc. etc. etc.
Three things.
All these are in triads. In threes. As part of one message.
This is typically used in writing (see this) and other similar disciplines (comedy, performing arts, etc) and the law finds application at multiple places.
You know three lives that you got when you played Super Mario? Contra? Or most other computer games? Three meals of the day? Three steps to success? Three wishes that you could make from the genie?
There is so many places where you see it. It is like the Golden Ratio. They are applied at places that you often fail to see. In fact, these “laws” are used by master communicators to influence conversations and moods. Reminds me of that famous talk by Steve Jobs at Stanford where he talks about some stories from his life. See it here…
Steve Jobs at Stanford
Can you guess how many stories does he talk about? Lemme know in comments.
You have three guesses. You know, three strikes.
In fact, most stories, folklores, and even films follow the three-act structure. The Hero’s Journey (the universal storytelling structure) is about three parts – go into an adventure, win a decisive battle, and come back. I am sure if someone were to dissect more great narratives, they’d spot these laws being used at multiple places in those texts!
So, the lesson for you and I while we write?
Next time you have to talk to someone, try by saying that you have three things to talk about. And then like a numbered list, say, first.. this; second that and third, whatever.
You would see that the audience pays a little more attention. Try it.
Next time when you have to write, try to write in threes. You can use this to write stories, essays, films, books, IELTS applications, blog, content, and whatnot.
Like this entire post is in threes. Just that this is the second thing of the third section. What about the third one? Guess?
Rant about how the world is being unfair to me. And how I would publish on a ‘Work With Me’ manifesto. You can ignore if you want to.
7:49 AM.
I was up at 530. And then I dozed off again. And then I woke up at again at 6. And then dozed off at 630. And then woke at 730 again. And just when I was about to sleep again, I decided that I need to get my butt moving. Took me two hours but here I am.
The year is coming to a close in a day and I am still to do my 2021 lists. Maybe I will spend the rest of the day with those. Let’s see.
So, I met with a friend from MDI yesterday (GK). This was the first time I was meeting with him, after MDI. And a lot has changed since then. It was tough to hold a conversation with him for the time I spent with him but it was compassionable and it felt easy. Guess that’s what cults do to you. Reinforces my belief that education at pedigreed schools and colleges is imperative.
I told him what all have I been up to lately. Asked him about his trip. Realised that he’s been spending time with dance. Told him that I want to pick up dancing as it will help my social skills. Our chats ranged from Jordon Peterson to Future of Humanity to Startups to Careers to MDI to common friends, food, and a lot more. I even narrated the outline of book2 and he seems to have liked it!
He talked about his belief that you could only be exceptional at 2-3 things in life and for multipotentialites like me, the real pain is to quit doing all the other thousand things that you know you are good at! May be that is the pain that I need to go thru to become great?
Oh, while parting, he sent me this…
Greatest lesson ever!
The other thing at the top of my head is that for some reason, the game (the world) and the players (aka people) in the game are not being kind to me. More so, I feel they are out there to take undue advantage. I have many examples but let me talk of two that are affecting me so much that I am, well, fucked in the head.
A, am trying to make a short film to learn the craft. And to of course pay a tribute to the track that I have come to love so much (Ankur Tewari’s Dil Haare). No, AT has not commissioned. He doesn’t even know this. I. am merely going. touse the track as backing audio. I don’t plan to release it except put it on youtube.
So, now, I have a limited understanding of the camera and I have been trying to meet people to seek help on it. And everyone that I talk to seems to be asking for a ridiculous amount of money. Even though I sound like an n00b when it comes to films, I am a co-producer with 2 short films now and I think I know what it takes / costs. And yet I am being taken for a ride. And the worst is that I can see that they are taking me for a ride. And I am telling them that I can see what they are doing and yet they are insistent! Funny No?
I am not expecting them to work for free. I am not taking away credit from them. All I am expecting is that they are reasonable. And yet they are not being.
B, The other is at the podcast thing. Without getting into specifics, people that I thought were nice and reasonable and easy to work with are acting funny. And I don’t like it. And I made it clear in as many words that I did not like it. And yet I am being disrespected. I mean all I have earned in life is a bit of respect (that too went down the drain when I had to take on debt to pay bills) and if something questions that, I don’t know what to do.
But I would make some changes in the way I work. I’ll come to it in a bit but before that, I think the world needs to learn humility and kindness and niceness. The world needs to learn that they are not in a one-time, winner-takes-all game. Life is long and you are known by the reputation that you build. What matters is what people talk about you when you are not in the room!
Anyhow. So the changes.
Here is a list.
Paperwork. I was one of those that would trust a handshake when I went into a business or work transactions. Now, I will ensure that everything I do will have a paper trail with everything in black and while. I need to spend time with contracts, terms, entry clauses, exit clauses, etc. I don’t like the idea of doing this and I thought I could change the way I worked. But no longer.
‘Work With Me’ Manifesto. Because I like working with multiple people on multiple projects, I need to write a ‘Work With Me’ Manifesto that I would mandate everyone to read and understand and internalize. I would add parts about trust, kindness, respect, long-term thinking, etc in that. Will even make it public and publish it on the blog for everyone to read and comment and make it watertight. Each new project that I get onto, the first email that I exchange, would have this. Update (as on 14 Aug 2021) – the manifesto is here. Still WIP though.
Live in Public. I have been talking about it last few days. I need to accelerate it. You think blockchain will solve all the trust deficit that we have? Nah. Living in Public will. Each time I get into a contract with someone, even though it may sound premature, I would make it public and post on the blog and on Twitter (the two places that I trust more than God).
That’s about it I guess for the time being.
While writing, I realised. I am still not cool btw 🙁
Moving on.
Had an interesting epiphany yesterday while I was waiting for GK to arrive. I realized that since I started writing these morning pages, I have not been writing at all. Plus these morning pages are like journals where I merely talk to myself. I am not creating content that I normally would. the ones where I want others to read, consume, think, bring about a change in their lives, give me feedback on, etc. Need to change that in 2021. Maybe bring back SoG?
Talking of change, the other thing that I would change in 2021 is that I would work very hard on creating a brand for myself.
This is something that I think about every year but hardly work on – I am way too introverted and shy to do this. Plus I think what is that I have achieved to be able to tom-tom myself? Isn’t the world already full of too many cluster-fucks, self-congratulatory messages, neverending stories of pathos, societies of mutual admiration, and more?
Why do I want to add to that noise?
I don’t know yet but what I do know is that I need to be out there if I want opportunities to come to me. And more importantly to people that I know of. And I need a brand for that. And that brand needs to stand atop one thing that encapsulates it all. May be marketing. May be side projects. May be Goa. I don’t know.
But brand SG has to get elevated in 2021.
And finally, before I end this, Sonali’s digital art is now online here! Yay!Please head over there and see if you like it and if you do, please consider spreading the word, and still better, buying!
I have had a sleepless night. After quite a while.
Why?
Well, multiple factors. Missed deadlines at work. Passion projects seemed to be going sideways. Personal life seems to be going off track. People clearly don’t like and I’ve built my life being a likable person and in general, being helpful and all. A friend turned client called me at 11 to complain about a colleague turned parter. A friend working on a startup seems to be struggling and I cant seem to help him at all. And there is a lot more!
It was so bad that I ended up loading on carbs like a mad man. All the lo-carb thingy that I was on since the last few days have gone for a toss. I would love to talk about what happened and why it happened and how it happened and if I was at fault. But writing about it and ranting about it would not help. I actually don’t know what would help. I guess this too shall pass. #note2self – write about these on #sgEchoChamber.
So, anyhow.
There were some silver linings as well. I have a few interns from SP Jain working with me to market the Marketing Connect Podcast and I had a session with them where I gave them gyaan. I realized yet again that I love talking to young people. Need to scale it somehow.
Plus, I was working out from Clay and towards the evening, I took time to see the sun go down at the Anjuna beach. It was mesmerizing. Doing nothing and watching the sun hide behind the waves. And since it was less crowded than the Baga where I normally hang out at, it was lovely. I must make it a practice to see it go down every day. There was this colleague at a point in time – Guru. He worked out of Goa and he would insist that we need to go watch it. Yesterday I saw that he meant. It was his birthday a few days ago and I must drop him a line, wishing him and thanking him for the tip. But then, he thought I was a nutcase and he may or may not read my email. Heck, his email address that I have may no longer be valid.
Anyhow, here are some pics for you to enjoy. I am proud of how these have come out. One of these has been edited.
Guess which one is edited? Lol, that’s probably the simplest quiz ever!
I think I have the talent for photography and I must pursue it. What do you think?
Damn I wish I had more lives!
Apart from this, I am not sure I can write a lot, to be honest. The head is still reeling from all the fuckery that happened yesterday. Of course, I am to blame for all of it. I need to mend my ways. If nothing else, I need to become so unbreakable that even though things so sideways, I need to not get riled up and eat like a man coming out of famine. I have to be stronger. Lol, self-talk!
It’s still 630. And less than the requisite 30 minutes of writing. Lemme carry on.
Oh yeah. One of my old employers and the man who taught me most of what I know called me after ages. He wanted some tiny help. Did that for him. I realised that I would do whatever it takes for his approval. In fact I am realising that if you dont take people from your past into your future, it is not the greatest feeling. While the novelty of a new relationship is exciting, the ease of doing things with the old is something that makes work happen faster!
Talking of fast, life in Goa is making me realize the importance of fast, high-speed internet. There are a million things that you take for granted when you are in the commercial capital of the world. Fast internet is one of those. The entire last night when I was rolling around in the bed, I realized that I couldn’t even distract myself by watching a mindless film because I did not have internet. I couldn’t work because a simple Keyword Planner tool on Google would not open up. This piece is being typed on my blog that is using an internet connection of my mobile phone that is hanging at the edge of the building I live at and I am perched up so that I could be in the range.
I can talk about slowness if I have to but I think I am not the one designed for it. I understand the concept philosophically but I don’t believe in it. Yes, there are things that need slowness to happen. But then that’s that. We can NOT extrapolate those things to everything else, like a lot of people do. Life has to be in the fast lane. I mean it is very very unpredictable. And is random at best. You are like a blip on the radar and you may just go poof randomly. I’ve lost someone important this year. And I know at least two friends that have lost a parent. I lost a classmate from MDI. She was my age. No, I did not know her at all. Even at MDI, I would have spoken to her probably once in all of two times and never ever since. But when I heard about her, I was zapped.
To be honest, I have nothing against the concept of death. I even believe in it. The problem is in the suddenness, the unpredictability, the waste of an opportunity that people and talent have when they die. I mean we lost Rahat Saab this year. Imagine the words he would write, the fires he would ignite in our minds, the impact he would have had if he were around!
I mean we could have an earthquake and all this planning of the future that never seems to be arriving could be rendered meaningless! If there is one thing that I am learning from the day yesterday, it is that life is fucking short. And slowness has no place in it.
You ought to act.
Now.
There’s no time like now. No place like here.
Err on the side of action.
Ready. Fire. Aim.
Steve Jobs has famously said, “your time is limited”. It is my screensaver.
The wallpaper on my phone is Memento Mori. It is the memento that I carry along. Must get one real-life, physical one.
Do not wait for perfection. This is a lesson that a 73-year old man once gave me. And trust me, this man HAS seen the world!
Do so much, so often that the trail you blaze leaves others in awe and makes them inspired to do more in life!
With that motivational pep-talk to self, I hope I would get over the fuck-all-ness of the day yesterday. Time to get going and act.
